Re-Living a Night-Mare Every Time You Close Your Eyes ...

I saw you that time .. even though it wasn't in the best of terms but i think there was a reason for my being there ..

I've seen a part of you that i almost took for granted .. I never though of you as angry, you were always so full of life ..

But that day, i saw that you weren't as strong as you show every one .. and i loved you even more in that moment ..

I saw your hurt, I heard your scream, i felt you shaking .. and every time I close my eyes .. I see your hurt, I hear your scream, and i feel your pain ..

How can someone so charming, so happy, go through that much pain ..

In that moment, I didn't know if I should hug you to keep you safe? or kiss you to make the pain go away just like my mom always did? or just let you be ? when I know the answer should be all of the above.. Hug you to keep you safe, then kiss the pain away, and then let you be ...

I was looking in the eyes of a friend that was hurting sooo much, and I for the 1st time in my life was helpless to do anything ..

I never felt so useless, soo unworthy ..

It was not my fight you say ?! but isn't it a friend's job to bring a smile to your face no matter what ?! be it a bad joke or a simple heart-felt gesture of just being there and giving them what they needed the most; a friend .....

I didn't see a tear, but i soo wanted to see one, just to reassure myself that you are indeed human. A tear would have been just what the Dr. ordered, but just like me, you had to show the world that you don't need any one, and ANY pain is bearable ..

No one can take away the screams that I hear every time i take a breath except you ..

Help me, Help you ... I can't stand to see you down .. please .... Help me .....